FRANK PREGNANCY TALK Frank discussion of pregnancy symptoms, emotions, side-effects and oddities.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Term of the Day: Cauliflower Butt

Definition: A mass of multiple hemorrhoid eruptions. If you’ve got three or more hemorrhoids and they become irritated and inflamed, your anus may end up looking like a piece of purple cauliflower.

Hemorrhoids are almost unavoidable during pregnancy. Some women get them all throughout the pregnancy, while others develop them during labor and delivery.
There are two types of hemorrhoids - external and internal. An external hemorrhoid is a vein that pokes out through the muscle wall near the anus. It usually looks like a swollen blueberry or cherry sticking out. Poking it back inside your rectum may provide some temporary relief as less ballooning out of the vein means less discomfort. Internal hemorrhoids are the same thing, just inside of the rectum. This puffing out of veins around your rectum may give your butt a cauliflower appearance, thus explaining my term of "cauliflower butt."

To help ease the swelling and pain of cauliflower butt, you might try an old trick of mine: after every bowel movement, gently clean the cauliflower with witch hazel pads (like Tucks) and then pack a bunch of clean pads on and around your anus. Change the pads every time you go to the bathroom. The witch hazel will cool the area and help reduce swelling.

Also, to keep your hemorrhoids from getting further aggravated, you may try: not straining while having a bowel movement; keeping your feet elevated as much as possible; sleeping on your left side; using Preparation H and other topical medicines; and keeping bowel movements regular with stool softeners and/or fiber.


Anonymous Mother said...

Ugh. Mrs. Roid. Sucks.

11:44 PM  
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12:34 PM  

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