FRANK PREGNANCY TALK Frank discussion of pregnancy symptoms, emotions, side-effects and oddities.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

A Dignified Response

First, a big THANK YOU to everyone who’s been so supportive of me and my book. Some of your comments resemble the first version of my “letter to the editor” (heh, heh) in response to this nasty review. In the end, this publicity has really helped sales of my book. In fact, I sent Ms. Hotchner a brief, yet kind, thank you note just yesterday.

Here’s my letter to the editor, which was published in this week’s paper:

Grossness and All

Dear Editor;

Fellow local author, Tracie Hotchner, wrote up an extremely nasty review of my book, Frankly Pregnant in last week’s Arts section. She starts out by saying, “a book so obnoxious in tone and demeaning to women that if 12-year-old boys could get pregnant, this would be their book of choice. Given that ‘grossing each other out’ is an essential pastime for prepubescent fellows, this book would be as satisfying to them as it is grotesque to a mature female.” I wonder how Ms. Hotchner could conclude that 12-year-old boys would enjoy my book? Is she a psychologist? Did she thoroughly study the mind of prepubescent boys? Does she have boys of her own, from which she draws such conclusions? No, she does not have boys of her own. In fact, Ms. Hotchner has never been pregnant.

Regardless, I don’t think Ms. Hotchner gets the point of my book. In Frankly Pregnant, I acknowledge many pregnancy books, including What to Expect When You’re Expecting and Ms. Hotchner’s Pregnancy & Childbirth in order to clarify the difference between my book and the others. I feel these books are extremely useful to pregnant women as they cover many aspects of health and medicine. I wanted to write a different kind of pregnancy book, one that tells more about the experience, as if talking to a pregnant girlfriend. My aim was to share the journey of pregnancy, yes- grossness and all, with other pregnant women to give them some assurance in knowing they’re not alone with all the strange, wonderful and sometimes extremely embarrassing changes you and your body can go through. During my first pregnancy I remember thinking, “wouldn’t it be fun to have a girlfriend who was pregnant and due about the same time, so we could share the experience and compare notes?” I wrote Frankly Pregnant so that other pregnant women could have what I didn’t– a week-by-week chronicle of the hormonal highs and lows and everything in between. I hoped that by sharing my story I might give a more personal insight into the real experience of pregnancy and giving birth.

My book may not be everyone’s cup of tea, as I warned in the introduction, “not for the dainty-mannered gal,” but for those pregnant women who are looking for something more candid than clinical Frankly Pregnant may be a welcome addition to their library of pregnancy books.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am far from amazed that Ms. Hotchner has not been pregnant. In my "motherly" eyes this is the number one qualification to write a pregnany book.

Stacy's book reflects a mother's and a girlfriend's view of pregnancy. While making me lol.

4:01 PM  
Blogger Julie said...

I have your book and I think it's a wonderful read.

5:41 PM  
Anonymous Izzy said...

Great letter! Someone who has never even been pregnant just doesn't get it. Pregnancy is beautiful and all that but hemhorroids? Pooping on the delivery table? Not so beautiful...
And yet, we still need to know these things. You're doing women everywhere a huge favor. Ignore the naysayers and congrats on all that free publicity!

8:19 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

Right on! Preach sistah. That was an awesome response. Good job!

3:26 PM  
Blogger Suburban Turmoil said...

That review was way out of hand. She could've said she didn't like it without being so incredibly hateful.

And right or wrong, if I know a pregnancy book is written by a woman who's never actually BEEN pregnant, I won't buy it.

Your letter to the editor was perfect.

4:12 PM  
Blogger GIRL'S GONE CHILD said...

Good for you. I think you ROCK!

8:04 PM  
Anonymous Mother said...

Wait. Hold the phone. She's never been pregnant?

Oh give me a break. Sorry. You have definitely had to have been there to say anything worth reading when it comes to pregnancy.


10:34 PM  
Anonymous Valerie said...

The woman is obviously bitter about something in her life(maybe she cant get pregnant and will never be able to experiece any of of joys you tell about in your book.) If thats the case, all we can do is pity her. Pregnancy is a part of life, gross stuff and all. And the information you showered us with in your book not only helped me through 10 wonderful months, but kept me intrigued for the next chapter to cone that I just had to skip ahead, even though it felt like cheating. Worded perfectly, it was like keeping in contact with my best friend. Some experiences shouldnt come with a little black bar, and if your letting your 12 year old son read this book, your going to have a lot more problems on your hand than puberty. Maybe someday she'll open her mind and realize that storks really don't deliever your baby for you. And here I thought maturity came with age.

1:24 PM  

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